Useful stuff and fAQS

Perhaps my greatest qualification as a doula is not WHAT I have but WHO I am. In many ways being a doula is a mindset. It’s more than a job or a set of qualifications that make me a doula. Being a doula is part of my identity. I am a mother. I have been pregnant. I have sadly lost babies. I have birthed. I have my own experiences. My own story. All of which makes me WHO I am. My formal qualification comes from being part of the Abuela Doula family. I trained with Abuela Doulas and the incredible Mars Lord by completing her Doula Preparation Course over a 10 month period. This course doesn’t aim to teach you how to be a Doula – rather it aims to prepare you for life as a doula. It encouraged deep introspection, awareness and curiosity. The course has a significant focus on cultural safety and the experience of black birthing people in light of the disparities of outcomes and injustices which exist. It requires continued engagement with my fellow birth and postnatal birth workers. I also sit on the board of Trustees for AIMS (The Association for Improvements in the Maternity Services). AIMS is a charity which exists to support maternity service users navigate the system as it exits and campaigns for a system which truly meets the need of all. This role means that alongside my personal work as a doula I can make an impact on the wider world of birth and its; political and social perspectives; now and for our own children.

I aim to be pretty flexible and it depends on what package or support you are looking for. I live in Headington, Oxford. If I am due to attend your birth then my aim is to never be more than an hour away from you. As a general guide I cover the following postcodes: OX1, OX2, OX3, OX4, OX5, OX10, OX13, OX14, OX29, OX33 and OX44.

No. I’m a champion for ALL births. There are only two ways to birth your baby; vaginally or abdominally with a caesarean birth. Both ways of birth are valid. Both can be peaceful empowering, satisfying and beautiful. Along the way there may be twists, turns and bumps in the road. Alternatively, the path may be clear and smooth. I’m here to support the journey. I have no real destination in mind other that the safe and satisfying birth of your baby. I believe very strongly that you already have the knowledge and capabilities to birth your baby in a way which is right for you. My role is to remain out of your way. To encourage you and champion your voice and choice as you walk your own path.

Well, it depends. My aim to be the person you need and do the things which will help at the time it’s needed. So what I ‘do’ really depends on the day and the circumstances. But, the kinds of things you may see me doing might include: talking and listening to your thoughts, fears and hopes. Offering signposting and an evidence base. Being a sounding board for you during your decision making process. Offering encouraging words and gentle reminders. A wink, or a smile or a gentle touch. Wiping brows, making tea and warming towels. Breathing with you, supporting relaxation techniques. Looking after older siblings, closing the door and dimming the lights.

Having a birth partner you love and trust and who loves you can be one of the biggest sources of comfort and strength in pregnancy, birth and the early days of parenthood. My role as your doula is to support that relationship and not to interrupt it. I can never take on the role of that person in your life and I wouldn’t want to. My aim is to work as a team. It’s worth remembering I’m also here to support birth partners on the path to parenthood too. It’s possible of course that there are things that I can bring in addition to what your birth partner can offer you, for example: An alternative perspective: Your birth partner will be invested in your pregnancy and birth in a different way to the way that I am. It’s worth remembering that birth partners are also experiencing birth in the moment with you. They will likely be experiencing a wide range of big emotions and responses for themselves. My aim is to watch over you, as your family expands with sense of impartiality and a degree of experience. Experience: Whist I’m not medically trained or qualified I am a self-certified birth geek. I’m also a mum of two so I have personally walked the path to birth. My training and work to become a doula has given me insight and understanding beyond what is often taught in the weekend classes. My ongoing personal development and the network of support and guidance I have in my work mean that I never lose sight of what’s important or fail to be in awe of birth. My sense of self as a doula and importantly my trust in the process of birth mean that I can bring a level of experience alongside a physical and emotional presence which will be supportive and helpful. An extra pair of hands: Warm towels anyone? There are often many little jobs to be done in birth. Dimming the lights, encouraging supportive touch, making tea, looking after siblings, or clearing up whilst you bond with your new born. The word doula comes from the Greek for ‘woman servant’. By being on hand to offer support in either small or big ways I can support you, your birth partner and the rest of your squad in fulfilling their own roles. Smoothing the way and supporting positive experiences.

I get it. From the moment you are told your estimated due date (EDD) that date feels fixed. It’s written in red pen on the calendar and you are already planning your life and activities around it. But I’ll let you in to the world’s worst kept secret. Roughly 4% of babies are actually born on their EDD (maybe the clue is really in the name!). However, we know that the vast majority of babies will be born within the two weeks either side of their due date. My ‘on call’ period is typically from 38-42 weeks. Should your birth begin outside of this period I will do everything humanly possible to be there with you. And rest assured, if I’m working with you and am due to be attending your birth I WANT to be there. With that in mind, I manage my diary carefully and do not take on more births that I can reasonably attend.

In both ‘The One with the Bump’ and ‘The One with the Birth’ packages I offer a number of hours of antenatal support with you and/or your birth partner(s). These sessions are yours. I will come prepared with an outline of some of the things you may wish to cover and a structure for how we can cover all the bases. I also have some tools are resources which can be helpful during these sessions. Or, we can freestyle. Every body, every birth and every baby is different. My aim is to be flexible and responsive to you and your needs. I’m YOUR Doula after all.

Then we pivot. We work together to devise a new plan. And if things change again then we will pivot again. We will dance, sway, tiptoe and stride our way. Nothing in birth is certain but I hope that you can be confident of two things: that YOU will birth your baby and that I will be there for you as and when you need me.

My packages have been created to make what I can offer easy to understand. They are based on my experience and designed to offer support that suits most people in most circumstances. If, for whatever reason they don’t work for you please do get in touch. I’m very happy to discuss your needs with a view to finding a solution that works for everyone.

It's pronounced 'Doo - la' - and you're welcome!